louder than sirens, louder than bells

207,697 notes

grossr5:

what if u had an identical twin that did porn and u like went to the grocery and theyre like “omg i saw u take 3 dicks at once while wearing a turtle costume” and ur like “god dammit gary”

(via pellygrine)

189,968 notes

king-in-yellow:

hopephd:

Seizure First Aid. 

Learn it. Share it. Know it. Use it. 

100% correct medical information on tumblr for once; also consider calling 911 if you don’t know how often the person has seizures and ESPECIALLY if the seizure has lasted 5 minutes or more (which is why the watch is critical)

(via sansa-snow)

165,225 notes

echoesofoswin:

leonkuwatastonguepiercing:

mukuroikusabaka:

finish this sentence: m

y body craves for the touch of mashed potatoes, the soft white flesh of the vegetable sliding over my body. i havent slept in fifteen days. only the beautiful rapturous gooey white semi solid plant matter inspires me to continue living. sometimes i like to imagine that the mashed potatoes have accepted me as their loving partner. oh can i dream.

What the actual fuck

(via fievel-goes-south)

36,297 notes

whitegirlsaintshit:

how can you suck dick like that? there’s no vacuum. his face is always gonna have a draft. you can smell his breath on every side of his face. this nigga can’t be near water no more, he’d drown trying wash his face. he ain’t never gonna replenish his thirst. smh i wish him the best.

whitegirlsaintshit:

how can you suck dick like that? there’s no vacuum. his face is always gonna have a draft. you can smell his breath on every side of his face. this nigga can’t be near water no more, he’d drown trying wash his face. he ain’t never gonna replenish his thirst. smh i wish him the best.

(Source: hugepoppa, via caseyanthonyofficial)